just reached home not long ago from a long ride.

monetary check: its not worth it as i actually had the chance to hop on to the train.

i figured i just needed some time alone to think through things again.

reality check: as i take a big risk to know more about a person, the longer the time spent, the more i know about him. it is bad. it is good as well. but its neither totally good nor bad. the question here is, does the answer lie more to good, or bad.

my heart has an answer. most of the time, its never wrong. however, my logic wants to take over. it has a conflicting interest.

when it comes to self-rating of a logical or emotional person, i rate myself as a logical young lady. but the fact is that i am emotional. as much as i want my logic to take over, it cant, cuz my heart is extremely disappointed.

hell with it.. ive trained it to be numbed anyway.

i fell asleep while trying to start my asssignment. dear me. hahaha.

my sleeping pattern has been on and off these days. and to be honest, ive problems scheduling my own time. i get distracted very easily. i waste a lot of time procrastinating. bleahhh

i need a wake up call.

lol.

nothing much on monday nights since they are always packed with lessons.

i went to the east for some work and then i went to visit my granny. my dad was there. we wheeled her to cgh. bumped into my brother and his gf there. my granny tells me that my bro’s gf spends some time with her everyday (since shes a PT there)

i like family gatherings. its nice that there were so many of us. i like the feeling. its heartwarming.

sometimes.. when you already know the answer, is there even a need to ask?

knowing too little is not that healthy as well.. as i will not learn anything.

it is depressing to see the ugly side of human.
money is the root of all evil.. but without money, you are nothing. money can however, allow you to make important decisions in life..

what makes me stronger.. is experiencing bitterness itself..listening to real life stories..getting in a closer touch to reality.

i always like to compare my life with other people’s life. then i realise, what i am going through, is nothing compared to theirs.

我要。。找回自己。

life has been good to me..as compared to the extreme cases ive seen. i do not know how they were able to cope with all the load on their shoulders, yet appear as if they live a blissful and happy life. i should really reflect on myself and stop all the trash i was doing.

i feel so helpless at times.

lets see…

cny. nothing exciting..lol. only thing is i wish shit never happened.

few catching up with my big groups like my e7 and pclique. small hangouts with angela..khairiyah.

i have been neglecting school work. haha. must really bang my head on the wall. tsk me.

some people i meet in my life.. are really funny. sometimes i dont know whether i should just laugh at my life..or them.

ending off~

i think this is nice.

im a fucking fool.

my granny is still hospitalised. sigh. the nurse said she was confused the night before. on the surface she seems emotionally ok. physically definitely no.

i just heard that my manager’s sister, who is younger than me, passed away..

seriously headache..